This is a speech that I gave to my school during Speech Day 2023 on the theme of “Looking Forward”. I wrote this speech because I witness all too often the internal and external pressures that my peers and the younger pupils in school face to be that “perfect child” that everyone wants to be. I want my voice to be one of encouragement: it’s okay if you don’t get the grades, or the report, or acceptance into that school you dreamt of for so long. These “dreams” shouldn’t hang over our heads and be obsessed over to the point that we view them as the single path to happiness. Enjoy 🙂

If you had peered into the dreams of my five-year-old self, you would have discovered a future princess commanding a grand castle that boasted a vibrant rose garden, two theatres, ten horses and twenty bedrooms.

Had you glimpsed into my daydreams at ten, you would have caught visions of a successful businesswoman living in a sleek, Japanese-style, glass-panelled house perched on top of a snowy mountain, married with three kids spaced three years apart, having two golden retriever puppies and spending her time between the Bahamas, Vancouver, Bali and New York. 

By the time I was fifteen, I was certain I would live in an apartment that overlooked Hyde Park with my two best friends, spend every morning feeding the ducks, work two productive hours at home, run errands at Harrods, then have a gentle, easy run towards Buckingham Palace and finish the day chatting with friends in a bar in the West End and seeing the latest shows together.

Today, I’m not so sure about any of those. 

Ask yourself: where do you see yourself in the future?

Is it a realistic aspiration or more like a fantasy, like my dreams were?

Chances are, when I asked about your future, many of you thought of specific events, possessions or achievements. Maybe it’s straight A*s complete with subject prizes and being top 1% in the world, acceptance into a single, specific university without which your life would be incomplete, or finding your soulmate who’s over six feet tall, CEO of his own tech startup, with sandy blond hair and ocean blue eyes. We all have this idealised notion of the “perfect life” that we ponder over, shaped in part by the values and expectations held by others in society and by our own exceedingly high standards. We tell ourselves that falling short of perfection means complete failure.

Thus, we relentlessly chase this mirage of perfection, leaving no room for error, for change, in fear that a single misstep will derail us from our meticulously planned trajectory.

But ask yourselves: is this a truly sustainable way to live? Being caught in a whirlpool of comparing our achievements with those around us, terrified of being left behind in a relentless race?

And to that, I would say no.

Relentless pursuit of an unrealistic ideal only sets us up for disappointment and sows seeds of self-doubt. We become pawns in the comparison game, constantly questioning, “How many marks did they get on the test?”, “How many A*s do they have?”, “Did they get subject prizes?” instead of celebrating our own unique strengths, personal growth and appreciating how far we’ve come.

So my challenge to everyone is this: let’s strive for progress, not perfection. Let’s concentrate on our own journeys, rather than comparing them to others’. Let’s embrace the ever-changing journey that is life and trust that we are on the correct path. 

Whilst five-year-old me would be very disappointed by the reality that it’s highly unlikely I’ll be a princess, I can tell you that our futures, imperfect, unpredictable but filled with boundless possibilities, are much more exciting.

Thank you.